


Who Said You Need an Excuse?

by SlytherinDiva666



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Friends to Lovers, Giant Spiders, Gotta Go Fast, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 05:47:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15090308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlytherinDiva666/pseuds/SlytherinDiva666
Summary: Due to the unfortunate events, Leo and Takumi are stuck traveling with Odin and Niles while trying not to ruin their friendship by boarding the love boat.





	Who Said You Need an Excuse?

**Author's Note:**

> Not all of the relationship in the tags are mentioned in the story and a lot of characters are mentioned but not in the story. This isn't supposed to be great writing just comic relief. Also, if you like anime, envision this in that style and it will be funnier. Hope I'll make you laugh.

Why me?" was the only thing that came to mind when Takumi saw his flight, leading to the delightful words, canceled. He and Leo were supposed to be going back to home to New York for the summer. But they both had terrible luck. He didn't know why but it was probably because everything was Murphy's law whenever he tried to travel like a normal human being. He would have better luck going to a beach and having mermaids ferry him to the Big Apple and somehow get him a winning lottery ticket. His phone rang, causing him to drop his bag on the floor when he saw it was Leo.

 

He met him in senior year when Sakura begged him to drive her to her friend, Elise's to see a movie on Netflix. It took Takumi a very long time to forgive Sakura who neglected to tell her friend's taste for scary shit and Leo didn't say a word when Takumi would randomly grip his hand throughout the whole movie, which happened to be "Hush." They never spoke of that day, though sometimes Hinoka would tease him about since Sakura thought it was hilarious enough to tell their older siblings. Ryoma would smirk and say nothing as Hinoka teased him relentlessly. Sakura would look him apologetically as if she didn't know Hinoka never forgets. His phone buzzed with a text from Leo.

 

"Pick up the phone, numb nuts." Takumi rolled his eyes and went to text but Leo called him again. He picked up since Leo was probably already in a bad mood.

 

"Would it kill you to text back? I swear, Takumi-" He cut him off

 

"Save your swears for later. Our flight got canceled." There was silence. 

 

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Leo sounded so done, it would have been funny had Takumi had not shared his pain.

 

"Would you like me to tell you that they bumped us up to first class and they're sending us complimentary jacuzzis?" Leo muttered something before answering.

 

"No, because Camilla's already going to break my rib cage when I get home. If she gets a jacuzzi, you and I would be in traction for the summer." Takumi shuddered. Camilla's hugs did cause one to need mouth to mouth after withstanding them. Leo sighed.

 

"Oh, god. I think I have a solution. Just pray I'm wrong. I'll come pick you up." Leo hung up, leaving Takumi in suspense. Gathering, his absurdly heavy luggage, he waited in the pick up point, wondering if he would get to know why Leo asked him to pray. Leo pulled up in his fancy, black convertible that his rich ass could afford, his sunglasses making him look even more rich.

 

"You know you look like a rich douche bag, right?" Takumi asked as he threw his bags in the back of the car unceremoniously. Leo smirked.

 

"That's the intention. No one wants talk to rich douche bags." Takumi rolled his eyes as Leo pulled out of the airport lot. 

 

"Alright, I have some good news and bad- DID YOU JUST PULL IN FRONT OF ME, YOU FILMY SLUG?!" Leo yelled at the car. Takumi sighed. He almost forgot about Leo's road rage. Good glory.

 

"I suppose you think you're clever, you repulsive, vile troglodyte. You will suff-" 

 

"Leo, seriously? You turn into Odin when you drive." Leo grimaced.

 

"Speaking of Odin, I found us away to get back home." Takumi smiled, glad he woud

 

"Great! When do we leave?" Leo sighed.

 

"You didn't hear the details. I called up Odin and Niles. Odin's family's friend has private plane and he has a license to fly it." There was silence.

 

"So, we would fly with your crazy roomates. One of them who always has his mind in the gutter and the other who sounds like he's in a bad rewrite of Shakespeare play. And they're dating. Woohoo." 

 

"We could just wait until another flight opens up." 

 

"Isn't Elise making dinner she's planned for awhile now?" 

 

"All the more reason to wait." Leo looked at his phone.

 

"Peri, Mozu, and Jakob are actually making dinner."

 

"Damn." 

 

"Sorry if it smells like bleach in here. Odin told me it would be good to clean in here. Apparently, the things we do in here make it essential to clean." Niles smiled over his shoulder as he stepped toward the front of the plane where Odin was doing stretches. 

 

"I could lived happily ever after if I spent the rest of my life never knowing that," Takumi muttered. Leo just stared at Odin.

 

"Odin Dark has now completed his specially modified pre flying regimen. The cloud dancing shall now commence!" Niles smiled affectionately as Odin pinned his pilot badge to his black t-shirt. 

 

"I told you trying touch your toes could make all the difference." 

 

"It has served many purposes. Some for gallant deeds and others so scandoulous that Odin Dark won't mention so his name isn't sullied in the hearts of many!" 

 

"Kill me now." 

 

"As soon as, we get in the air, we jump off." 

 

"Are we going to hold hands again?" Takumi gave Leo the death glare, which he returned with a smirk.

"Come on, we pinky swore not to talk about it!" He reminded him in an angry whisper, so Niles wouldn't hear. Leo shrugged and sat down, beating Takumi to the window seat.

 

Niles took the liberty to put on music. Not just any music though, the kind that "sets the mood." The kind that you hear behind a closed door with a tie on it. And that no one ever remembers to shut off, if you catch my drift. Takumi recognized it when he would come to pick a grumpy Leo when Niles and Odin kicked him out. He smirked at Leo, who narrowed his eyes at him. 

 

"I was going to offer you a book but I see you're entertained enough." Leo smiled to himself as Takumi paused before giving him puppy dog eyes.

 

"I have three sisters. That is not going to work," Leo said, proud of his immunity. Then, he looked at Takumi. No one could resist his puppy dog eyes. That's how he got Ryoma to bake him cookies for practically every week of second grade. 

 

Leo cursed and pulled a book out of his bag.  
Takumi smiled sweetly and Leo smiled back  
even sweeter, though the undertone was mocking. They both stared at each other for a bit before Leo looked away. Takumi smirked, flipping to a random page.

 

"Look at me," he breathes and I stare up at his smouldering grey gaze. It is his Dom gaze - cold, hard, and sexy as hell, seven shades in one enticing look."*

 

Takumi didn't know what he just read but it was sure as hell not "The Decline And Fall of The Roman Empire." 

 

Leo looked up, poised to turn the page on a book that probably didn't make him want to claw his eyes out.

"What? Need help looking up a word?" Leo asked, leaning over to look at the words that made Takumi's face turn into a tomato.

 

"You'd probably get more out of it if you started at the-" Leo choked when saw the sentences of sin, text blacker than Camilla's mascara. There was only one person that would think that replacing wholesome history with "50 Shades of Grey" was funny.

 

"Everything all right back there?" Niles asked. Leo glared in his direction. Takumi cringed. Leo showed no mercy to the following: Drivers, Stupid drivers, those who participated in pillow fights, and those messed with his books.

 

"Just peachy, Niles," Leo answered.

 

"Oooh. Before I was with Odin, there were many peaches I wanted to bite. You get him, brother!" Leo and Takumi were now tomato twins. Takumi sunk further down in his seat and Leo looked out the window, his book now forgotten.

 

Takumi didn't know he fell asleep until he was jolted awake by his head hitting the back of his seat. Leo's grip on the armrest rivaled Sakura's when she used to be scared of horror movies, hard on his white kuckles.

 

"We're having turbulence," Leo stated. 

 

"Thanks, I didn't notice," Takumi said, rubbing his now sore head. If only he had been wearing a pot.

 

"No storm will best Odin Dark! The storm's efforts will be fruitless and it's resolve will soften!" Odin declared.

 

"That's what she said," Niles chimed in. Before Leo could tell Niles off, the plane lurched again, causing Leo to take a sharp intake of breath, finger digging into the arm rest. Takumi hesitated before offering his hand to Leo. Leo looked at him in surprise before slowly letting his grip slacken on the the chair, that would probably never be the same again. 

 

He accepted Takumi's hand, giving him a small smile in graditude. He felt himself blush and was thankful when Leo looked away. He did the same, looking at the floor. It was silent for a while, Leo's grip changing sporadically. Takumi felt himself drift off before Odin let out a triumphant laugh, startling him and Leo, their hands still interlocked.

 

"Haha! Odin Dark has mastered the art of flying through pathetic wind storms! He can now land the plane!" Niles looked confused.

 

"Land? But honey bear, we're not even close to New York." 

 

"I know, lambkin, but my dear father neglected to fuel up properly after the last flight," Odin explained. 

"Where are we landing?" Leo asked, letting go of Takumi's hand, leaving it now unpleasantly cold.

 

"It is unknown! The answer lies within the GPS!" Odin was silent for a moment.

 

"We're landing in Pennsylvania, as far from New York City one can be and still be in Pennsylvania." Niles sighed.

 

"Oh, goody."

 

They landed in a small airfield where Odin's family had connections. Takumi thought Leo was going pass out when they landed, but luckily, he seemed to an alright in the end. They walked a mile to a motel when it start to rain, soaking them to the bone. By the time they got there and got a room, it was almost ten. 

 

"Glory be! A bed!" Odin dropped his luggage and went to jump but Niles put a hand on his arm.

 

"Odin, darling, if you jump on that bed without changing into dry clothes, you won't get to taste the Nile river for a long time." Odin hesitated. Takumi choked and Leo covered his face with his hands, wondering why he was friends with these people. Odin swallowed. 

 

"Would you, my fairest Niles, like to join me in cleansing of body and spirit?" Niles smiled.

 

"I would love to." Odin ran to open the door for Niles, who gave him a charming smiling. They shut the door and then the same music from the plane began to play.

 

"Why do you have the most shameless roommates?" Takumi asked, getting two complimentary robes out of the closet and tossing one to Leo. 

 

"Why are you complaining? You don't have to hear Odin Dark riding the rapids of the Nile river on a regular basis," Leo answered, taking off his shirt. 

 

"Oh, god, are you serious?" Takumi turned around as they continued undressing.

"Do you think I could make that up?" 

 

"Do you want me to answer that?" Takumi sat on the bed.

 

"This is pretty nice for a hotel bed." He went to lay down but was met with a furry nightmare. Takumi shrieked, jumping on Leo in fear, who startled by Takumi's scream also screamed.

 

"What the hell, Takumi!?" Leo asked, his robe sash sloppily tied, showing his chest, while still impressive, was not sporting a six pack.

 

"Spider. Furry ass spider." Leo paled if that was possible. 

 

"Damn. Where is Odin when you need him?" Leo muttered.

 

"Isn't he taking a dip in the Nile River?" Takumi couldn't help it.

 

"Shut up, Taku- OH, GOD, IT MOVED! IT MOOOVED!" Leo sounded like a Justin Bieber fan as he scrambled away, dragging Takumi with him. 

 

"WHERE!? WHERE?!" Takumi knew he looked crazy, holding Odin's wooden staff from his D&D phase like a sword, which Odin used as cane to look more hero like when walked a mile.

 

"I DON'T KNOW!" Somehow, Leo had managed to get on his back and not fall, a technique Takumi never mastered with his older siblings, while he was on a chair. It was silent for a minute before Leo screamed, causing Takumi to scream again. They fell on the bed without the spider before getting up scanning the area frantically.

 

"How can they not hear us?" Takumi asked, looking at the bathroom door.

 

"It's that gosh darn sex music!" Takumi raised his eyebrow at his toned down language.

"What? I don't want my first words to my family to be "Hey, what's fucking up sis- OH SHIT! IT'S ON THE BED! IT'S ON THE FUCKING BED!" Leo dramatically jumped off the bed, Takumi falling with him. 

 

"Oh, that's it! Die already!" Takumi tried to hit the spider but it scurried out of the way. Leo snatched the staff.

 

"I got this. YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM ME, YOU CONTEMPTIBLE, HUGE ASS SPIDER! I WILL ERASE YOU!" Leo slammed down the staff with all of his might. It missed. 

 

"It's moving again." Takumi was too tired to scream anymore. The sex music stopped. Leo and Takumi looked at each hopefully.

 

"NEVER FEAR! I, ODIN DARK HAS COME AT THE DARKEST OF HOURS! TO SLAY THE FEROCIOUS BEST THAT THREATENS THE LIVES OF THE HUMAN RACE AND THIS ADORABLE BATH ROBE!" Odin picked up the spider and let it go.

 

"WHY DIDN'T YOU KILL IT! WHAT IF IT COMES BACK?!" Leo sank down in the chair, tired of trying to erase spiders. Niles chuckled.

 

"Don't worry. It will probably just wants to take a legful of Takumi's hair and just-" 

 

"Niles, finish that sentence and I will find that spider and make you eat it." 

 

"My, my, aren't we touchy. The shower is all yours if you wish." Leo laughed.

 

"I'm as likely to get in there as the spider is of joining me." Takumi had a terrible mental of image of Leo in the shower with a giant spider, stripping. How was he ever going to sleep tonight?

 

After getting a rental car and insuring Leo didn't drive, Takumi was exhausted. If he heard Niles say "Oh, yes!" in the most sexual way possible, he was going to die. Between Niles sleep talking and Odin snoring, he had share a bed with Leo so, naturally that meant he had to make sure not to touch him. Which happens to be impossible because Leo was extremely cuddly in his sleep. He spooned Takumi all night and he was sure he was still blushing. 

"I think we'll have to stop for gas soon. The light's on," Niles remarked. Takumi was surprised he actually made a statement that was useful.

 

"But it's not only thing that's turned on." Never mind.

 

"Well, there's one at the next exit. We don't want a repeat of the plane." The car started to sputter.

 

"Oh dear god, please no," Leo begged. Niles sighed as he pulled over. 

 

"Guess the gas meter is shot," Takumi muttered.

 

"I suppose I'll get the rental company on the phone. Come on, darling." Odin followed and Niles winked at Leo, who just made a confused face.

 

"Leo, are you aware you spooned me last night?" Leo turned into a tomato again and Takumi had a strong feeling they were going to be tomato twins by the end of this conversation.

 

"I-I was not. But thanks for the update." Leo grabbed his water bottle but was too flustered to open a bit.

 

"I didn't mind. It was ... nice."

 

"You're joking. Nice? I happen to be an amazing cuddler!" Leo exclaimed indignantly. He opened the water bottle and drank it very purposefully.

 

"Sorry. It was more than nice but if I said that then you might realize I was in love with you." Takumi froze when he realized he said that aloud. Leo spat out his water. He was right. They were tomato twins now.

 

"Damn, you can just forget I sai-" Leo grabbed his face and kissed him. All Takumi could think was how he couldn't think right now. All he could focus on was Leo and his surprisingly soft lips for a guy who believe in lip balm. They broke away, breathing perfectly normal unlike Niles and Odin according to Leo. They, apparently, sounded like a runner who accidently signed up for a whole marathon instead of half.

 

"Wanna go make Niles and Odin uncomfortable?" Takumi asked.

 

"I doubt that's possible but any excuse to kiss you again," Leo said bluntly, his cheeks tinged red from what Takumi would like to think was his smoking hot looks, but it was probably really from the heat in the car.

 

"Who said you need an excuse?" 

 

*Quote from 50 Shades of Grey by E.L James.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for you reading and hope you enjoyed. Sorry if typos bother you because I don't care to fix them most of the time.


End file.
